anxiety, embodied and emotional
Healing and soothing anxiety without an understanding of the embodied nature of anxiety is like trying to clean a greasy pan without soap. It just doesn’t work.
A common misconception about anxiety and even therapy that is targeted to decrease anxiety is that anxiety is only in the brain. It manifests itself in the form of worrisome thoughts. Which is partly true. But it’s merely a slice of the pie.
First of all, anxiety is embodied. When you are in an anxious state, the body responds before the brain. Your body perceives (or neurocepts) a threat of some kind, before the thought “I’m feeling anxious” enters your prefrontal cortex. In other words, your sympathetic nervous system has already kicked into gear long before you’re consciously aware of it. Your body is getting prepared to fight off potential (whether real or imagined) danger, so it does what it was biologically designed to do— adrenaline kicks in, your heart starts to race, your muscles get tight, and you’re ready to fight, flight or freeze.
Let me explain the “imagined” part because it’s important. When someone lives with consistently high, untreated anxiety and stress (as many, many people do), they might develop something that Dr. Stephen Porges calls “faulty neuroception.” This is when a person perceives danger in a safe environment or may perceive safety in a truly dangerous environment. I could write an entire blog post on this topic, but for the sake of this entry, here’s the point— anxiety isn’t just the result of being in an actually dangerous situation. Anxiety is also the result of a multitude of imagined threats, stories that our minds write about our unlived futures. Those stories don’t just live in our brain, but their words are stamped on every part of our nervous system.
Not only is anxiety embodied, but it’s also an affective experience. In other words, anxiety is an emotion word and an emotional experience. It is not difficult for people to label their experience of anxiety or their anxious thoughts. But what about the emotions linking arms with it? Anxiety is born of fear. If anxiety is the tip of the iceberg, fear is the massive chunk of ice under the surface that can’t be seen. This is why our bodies respond to anxiety in such an embodied way! Our bodies were designed to protect us in the face of danger.
Lindsay Braman is one of my favorite therapists. She has incredible graphics on her website, many of which have become some of my favorite psychoeducation tools to use with clients. She created an emotion-sensation wheel that I love. The emotion words she uses to describe or expand on the word “fear” are embarrassed, unwanted, inferior, insecure, anxious, and scared. Some of the sensations she lists as being associated with those emotions include tense, cold, unsteady, blushing, quiet, racing heart, fidgety, foot tapping, and trembling. Other emotion words that typically lie under the tip of the anxiety iceberg are frightened, nervous, jittery, or overwhelmed.
Dr. Paul Ekman, an emotion researcher and trainer, created the Atlas of Emotions. Fun fact— he also served as a scientific advisor for the movie Inside Out! He outlines 7 Basic Emotions, one of which is fear. He describes emotion words related to fear starting from the least intense, to the most intense. These are trepidation, nervousness, anxiety, dread, desperation, panic, horror, and terror. (*For real, if you’re looking for a way to increase your emotional intelligence for free, Google the Atlas of Emotions!)
If it’s true (which it is) that anxiety is not only a cognitive experience, but an emotional and embodied one as well, then soothing anxiety needs to involve more than just thinking happy thoughts. If you are trying to treat your anxiety using only thought replacement techniques and cognitive reappraisals, you’re never going to actually heal. So, here is a quick list of tips and strategies that you may find useful. Because let’s be real— if you’re alive right now, you’re experiencing heightened amounts of anxiety. We’re living amidst a global pandemic, there’s a presidential election just months away, and millions of people have lost their jobs and/or loved ones. Being alive right now is traumatic (and I’m not exaggerating, nor am I being funny). I’m simply stating the facts. Just yesterday, I accidentally saw the video of the explosion in Beirut and people covered in blood, and my body immediately reacted. I felt afraid, sad, and horrified, and based on my physical sensations, I knew a stress response had been activated.
Okay so back to tips and strategies. Because we all need to be taking care of our hearts, minds, and bodies right now more than ever. Mental health is physical health— nothing is separate, and you are not a brain on a stick. So, you’ll notice how many of these activities involve the body (because, repeat it until you know it in your bones— anxiety is an embodied experience).
Breathe. Intentionally. Deeply. In for 4. Hold for 5. Out for 7. Pick your own numbers. The key here is to make sure that your inhale is shorter than your exhale. Exhaling longer and slower helps to activate your parasympathetic nervous system (which is the yang to your anxiety).
Meditate. This isn’t some trippy, dippy, hippie shit, people. It’s for real and thanks to your Vagus nerve, can literally change your nervous system and calm you down. Insight Timer is my favorite app for meditations (and it’s free)! A lot of people I talk with say they don’t meditate because they’re bad at it/can’t stay still for that long. This is precisely why you need to meditate! Insight Timer offers amazing 2-3-minute meditations (and longer ones as well). But start small. Honor your baby steps. If you have chronic anxiety, simply doing a very short meditation is a steppingstone towards healing and change.
Stop being so hard on yourself because you struggle with anxiety. Anxiety is a part of the human condition and it’s normal. There’s nothing wrong with you. If you aren’t anxious right now given the state of our world, are you actually even human?!! Anxiety isn’t “bad”. Anxiety is actually quite adaptive. It fuels us to deal with potential threats that may come our way. It can energize us when we need it too. It protects us, preserves us even. It can even be transmuted into wisdom. Be compassionate towards your anxiety. Fighting with it adds fuel to the fire.
Walk it out. Taking walks (not necessarily for the sake of exercise) but for the sake of clearing your head and processing life. It boosts endorphins and other feel good chemicals and can also boost your creativity! It decreases stress and also helps you connect with your body. Gentle movement is really important for mental health.
Get curious about your anxiety. Instead of asking yourself, “Why am I anxious” ask yourself, “What am I afraid of?” Get to the core fear, get to the root. Journal about. Talk with a trusted friend. Externalize your fears by illustrating them or even dancing to music. Name it. Get it out of your body.
Increase your emotional literacy and intelligence. Dig in and learn about your emotions. Practice labeling them, as well as their accompanying physical sensations.
Engage in prayer or another spiritual practice. This is similar to meditation. Spirituality is a powerful way of managing anxiety unless it’s used a way of bypassing unresolved trauma or as a way of avoiding emotional experiences. That’s not helpful. What is helpful is engaging with God or your Higher Power in prayer, reading religious or spiritual texts, and grounding yourself in your spiritual truths or life values.
Practice mindfulness. Mindfulness is simply just paying attention to the here-and-now experiences of life. We so often (unconsciously) live in our past or our futures. Anxiety often propels us into our imagined futures. Practicing mindfulness can bring us back to the present. Let’s practice. You’re likely reading this on your computer or phone. Pause and notice what you hear right now? What can you smell, taste, or touch? What else can you see? Congratulations, you just practiced mindfulness!
This list is in no way exhaustive, but I hope it gives you a place to start.
You deserve to take care of your body and your soul. It’s actually crucial if you are to show up in this world as your most wholehearted Self.